Well I'm home!!

Ya-woo! I'm very excited. Job offers came in last week and so I hopped on a flight to CA and landed Sunday. I'm home until the following Sunday to coordinate the international move, but more importantly see my family and friends. I met Michaela for the first time last night and that was exciting. Hannah unfortunately was quite shy and her memory failed her from our past encounters so I must rebuild our bond with games of peek-a-boo, baby einstein, piano playing and noise making contests.

I haven't decided on the job just yet, but by the end of today a decision will be made and life will move ON.

Please call my parents or mom's mobile to reach me.
HOme 714 956 5414
Mobile 714 883 0658

Look forward to seeing people.
L

Buyer's Remorse???



You never really know what you're getting yourself into when you buy a house. You don't know what the area is like to live in, you don't know your neighbors, transport functionality, basic logistics and how day-to-day life will pan out.



One recent trip to our local proved informative.



2 pints of lager = $5

Admission into the lounge for live entertainment =$12

Bartender serving beer in bath robe plus towel on her head = Priceless



In my area I can buy a goat's head, ox tongue and a dried chicken. I have stepped over the Bob Marley look alike who was exhaling an odorifous amount of mary jane and appeared to just be chilling on the sidewalk. I have sung along to "How Great Thou Art" while shopping for veg on the high street only to realise that the hymm was getting louder from the people walking beside me. (a possible Fame episode could have broken out.) I have relied too long on grocery store signage and need to learn the different fruit and veg as most of the world knows the difference between a mango and papaya. I live near Netto, it sounds like Ghetto and is a lovely grocery store I'm sure, but like I said, it sounds like ghetto. I have given to those with there hands held out needing a little help.



Recently a woman approached the car as we were turning down the street. She looked quite upset and approached the car in hysterics asking for money to help feed her children. She stated she needed nappies and milk. Ian looked over to me and so I tried to get the fiver to her as quickly as possible. She took it and off she went. Quite proud of my good deed, Ian said, "what are you doing? she said she needed to feed her kids Nappies and Chips! Who buys there kids Chips? She's a crackhead! You just subsidised the poppy fields in Afghanistan. Nice work!"

Well Kuwait was interesting to say the least. I took a red eye from London and arrived first in Doha, Qatar and then to Kuwait City. Doha was amazingly hot and humid, heat that I have never experienced. My flight was full of travellers headed to exotic destinations and did not adequately prep me for the adventure. Pretty hungry I took advantage of the coffee shack and made a trip to the ATM and pulled out 100 Qatari $. 30 of these smackers got me the coffee and pastry I needed to hold me over until the Kuwaiti hunger strike. 30, I'm really hoping that wasn't $30, better yet, I'm really hoping that the coffee wasn't 30 Pooounds! Note to self, check Torrance credit union when I arrive in Kuwait. I soon headed north and landed in Kuwait City, this airport is not so international. The Arabian Knight get up is very daunting to say the least. Well I pulled another $100, but this time Kuwaiti dollars (KD) from the ATM. Who knew that Kuwait recently separated from the dollar? Who knew it surpassed the British Pound? Who knew it was a 1:4 ratio? Who knew that I only needed 2 KD for incidental tips for my 3 day stay? Live and learn. Well it was bloody hot. And despite being told that the hotel would happily serve me food behind closed doors, this didn't exactly happen. I joined my Muslim brothers and sisters and partook in the Ramadan fast. Begrudingly, yes, but a days feast awaited me at sundown.

Why was I there? I was recruited for an MBA Talent Recruit position. I would be travelling to the top universities to find talent that would come and work for Alghanim Industries, a huge conglomerate based in Kuwait whose span is far reaching. While the role sounded exciting and the people were great, who knew Kuwait just wouldn't appeal. The one benefit of working there would have been honing my marketing and sales skills....painting a picture of Kuwait to the most recent graduate of Harvard...who could resist the proposition? Driving around was very odd. There are parts Kuwait City that look like LA, new strip malls, the biggest SUVs, the worst food chains...Applebee's, Fuckruckers and Chi Chi's. I mean really folks, Chi Chi's? That's a Mexican food restaurant that I would every so often visit when I was at Uni at St. Norbert's in Wisconsin! Wisconsin food chains have no business every going international, let alone an ethnic restaurant with no Mexicans anywhere close to the midwest. I digress. But it did appear that every poor food chain had capitalised on the war and introduced itself during the rebuild. As for the rebuild, a lot of construction is happening and cranes fill the skyline. So I did receive my first job offer, but destination Kuwait is not in the cards for me. I'm not ready to give up the Euro lifestyle, live inside for four months every year, regard the GYM as a night out on the town, completely detox.

Also, the flight back was a little intense. Can we say, "fish out of water?" I first approached the customs desk where I was asked to show my Kuwaiti visa, "um, what if I packed it?" the gruff look was enough for me to start praying to Allah to please for the love of god and all that is sacred and holy may I find that Kuwaiti visa in my purse. The shout out to Allah, Buddha and MOses must have worked. Then as I'm waiting for the x-ray screeners some fool walked through with 2.5 gallon jug of water. Here I'm thinking, "Um sir, that's how a bunch of crazies in London grounded all flights, tried to blow up air fleet, and made me smuggle lipstick on board for the past year." I appreciate this man's pilgrimage, but not cool.

Then every which language being spoken and the little Arabic that I've learnt from Howard Stern just wasn't cutting it. We boarded the plane and not only was I a young, lovely American female there was about 109 years difference between me and the other 3 ladies onboard. Hmmm, this might cause some distraction to folks. Sing along folks, this next tune is from Sesame STreet.... "Which one of these is not like the other, which one of these is standing alone, can you guess which one is not like the other...can you guess which one?" So as the plane engine began to roar, behind me were two fools praying aloud. While I appreciate god fearing people, I really like to know what's being said, another fool is putting on his scented oils that began to kill my nostrils yet heighten my awareness to a few key things learnt from Barbara Walters on 20/20 post September 11th, and the mad tripper sitting beside me was looking at me and then back over his shoulder to his friends, back and forth, back and forth.....oh holy moses! The exit door on my right was looking pretty good and yes, I have read my Worst Case Scenario handbook and you better be damn sure that I know how to open that door. Serious angst, bad voodoo and a lot of smelly men later, I soon arrived back in London sans my Ambien and completely knackered.

I can't tell you exactly what it was, but Kuwait is not the place for me. I had a few people think I was Lebanese, Syrian and/or Palestinian. Who knew?

Enjoy the sounds of the Imam whose prayers are amplified around the neighborhood.

Have a rockin' Ramadan.

Salam Malakim,

Laura

I'm headed to Kuwait!

I'll check it out for everyone and will report back.

I'm thinking it will be hot, I'll have to wear way to many clothes and I'll be hungry until 5 p.m. Little do they know that I snuck a few rice cakes and peanut butter.

Hopefully, many photos to come.

Love, L

Putty, The High Five G-G-Guy

Does everyone remember Putty from Seinfeld? Every time he greeted or parted ways with someone, he was quick to extend the high five. Well since then and the end of my sporting days, I've been quite put off by the high five.

So this morning as the fog parted and sunlight busted through, I decided to go for a run. Living at the bottom of hill, I trudged up the street once again, I was thinking that I should be way more buff for enduring these hill runs which I equate to San Francisco or Edinburgh. As I reached the peak quite out of breath and sounding like Jason of Friday the 13th, I turned to find the Mommy and me stroller (pram) brigade headed my way. As I approached, I checked out the kids and the one closest to me I sized up as a cute, little 2.5 year old girl, big eyes, and ringlet brown curls. As I edged around them, the cutest little hand reached out from the stroller, fingers stretched offering the high five. I couldn't let her down, and I reciprocated....High 5 Ggg-guy. It was good stuff.

No pics for this one, just think of the lil hand.

L

Well summer has come and gone. Despite the heavy rains and flooded, I still enjoyed my time out and about. The summer kicked off with Her Majesty's stamp of approval for my extended work visa. A lot of good that's doing me right now. I'm feeling it, jobs are just around the corner. Please pray that the stars and moon align and I do well on my upcoming presentation. I pounded on the doors of the Big Four, and one of them is going to let me in.

Highlights included travelling to Athens, Chicago, Edinburgh for graduation, Ireland with mom, La Roche Barnard (Bretagne) for Ian's Dad's 75th and Edinburgh for the festival. Weekend festivities included Innocent's Village Fete (hung with MBA folks,) seeing Scissor Sisters, going to the Proms (the BBC summer symphony,) walking 7.5 miles to Columbia Market to buy some flowers (we got transport back and this is where i buy more flowers that vases-one of the City's best kept secrets,) mom and dad's visit-kicking Ian out of the flat (for their arrival,) Le Tour de France, and of course not having a job. I'll have to go back and see if I ever shared the experience of La Roche Bernard; it was an amazing little village that I highly recommend if you're on this side.

Remember $400 flights! Just think the money you save on the flight will help toward the Pound/Dollar conversion that is not quite working in my favor.

I'll have you know that I did celebrate Labor Day, I have to stay true to my American roots and there was no way I was about to work. I'm keeping it real, right? Well it sounded good, but I didn't have a job to go to anyway.

Signing off, come visit, don't be a snooze fest.

LO

Is it starting to sink in???

Ian and I bought a house! Ya-woo. I'm quite excited that I will soon stop living like a step above the Parade of Horribles in Paris. Oh yeah, so I guess that would mean that we are back together. I think Ian is the only one really concerned that love has been professed on the blog. I have no idea where I will land a job, but at least I'll have a home that can host all of my friends and family in sunny So Cal. Flights are cheap people, Brit Air for $400 or so from LA. I've got ya thinking now, don't I?

So we will be living in Nunhead, a stones throw from Peckham and East Dulwich. I'll include a few other pics, but my sisters are quite disappointed that the interior resembles a house in Irvine; it's been gutted and properly restored. Hassle free for me! It's kind of amusing considering if we opted for the true 1890's version, we'd have an outhouse. I'll take irvine any day, sans poltergeists and 1960's kitchens. This house is Clean!

And P.S. I'm not telling anyone about the house purchase. It's on the blog, there will be no favoured emails. Keep up.

Alright, I'm testing this out to see if the video stream will work. It's a new feature for the Blogger and I'm quite excited. Let me know if it bogs down your systems or if it's just like viewing other nonsense on YouTube.

Assuming you can check out the video you will soon learn that most of my videos run 2 minutes long. Originally, I had assumed that (key word assume) my camera maxed out at 2 minutes. Au contraire....definitely user error and due to a weak index finger.

Well I have learned over the past 2 years what endears me to certain countries over the another and often it comes down to music. While the memories may fade of fabulous meals, accents and daily excursions, I have found that often it is the music in the background that pieces my life together.

One of the greatest highlights of my China trip was stumbling (not in the drunken sense) into this bar to find a great Chinese band where the lead singer performed One Night in Beijing. Despite the fact we were really in Shanghai, my Shanghai sidekick, Cecile and I took in the scene. It was an obvious crowd pleaser and a little english went a long way. Blending modern and traditional song and voice, this song set the backdrop for my trip.

Let's see if it works.

Kisses, L

I didn't tell you that I'm an auntie again!

..........Michaela Grace......

..........5 June 2007..............

she was really small and born on my Grandpa's birthday which was kinda cool.

I'm feeling slightly guilty that I had prepped you for the arrival of the first niece, Hannah, that I have completely neglected her sister. Considering how partial I am to second babies and our mutual family placement/ranking, she'll be spoiled from abroad. I just bought a shirt for Michaela which reads, "No one puts baby in the corner!" Good stuff, if you're not up on your movie references that's your problem.

As for further family updates, my niece Hannah was in a cast most of June. A broken leg that apparently the family suspected due to the subtle limp, but was not detected in the docs office. Too bad she wasn't slightly older because she could have reenactment from my sister's, Mo's, childhood years. When Mo was about 3, she walked around with a walking stick/cane for like 6 weeks. I don't exactly remember the cause of such intense trauma. Mosquito bite, bruise from falling off a bike, I kicked her??? The cause escapes me, but the vision of the 3 year old sis walking with such caution and bracing herself upon the bark was priceless. I think that was the impetus for the method acting.

So this is the email I get from my sister......

Subject line: "Why are you following us?"

I open it up and here's this silly picture and the explanation that my sisters and mom were dining in King's Fish House and they looked over their shoulders to the wall beside them and there I was in that Sadie Hawkins country shirt and 5th grade look-alike photo haunting them.

Graduation!

Enquiring minds wanted to know Cap and Gown?? No, I didn't have to wear the cap.

Well I have been finished with school for quite sometime. Dissertation was submitted in December, I found out I passed in February and June was graduation. Behind in the photo is McEwan Hall where I donned my gold and black dress and was hit on the head with John Knox' pants (UK pants aka underwear, squirrel covers, BVDs.)

Graduation was quite memorable. My parents came out and spent time with me in London and Edinburgh. Friends from all over the world descended on the city to join in our celebration. The day brought a mixture of emotions: Elation that I actually did get to graduate; Pride for never giving up; Sadness for the friends that will scatter; Blessed that I was afforded such a lifetime opportunity; Hope for what will unfold. I only left in September 2005 and while time has passed quickly, so much has been discovered and Redondo Beach seems a lifetime ago.

I did want to thank everyone who has given me words of encouragement and phoned, written, emailed, chatted, skyped (yes Skype people!) and visited. There were many times that these conversations came just at the right time like little angels knowing that I needed to hear a friendly voice to say, "hey" "when are you coming home" or "we miss you". Thank you!

Now a new adventure awaits. For the time being, I will continue to be a stay at home mom with no kids. And now back to the job search.

Love Loyalty and Friendship,

Laura

When all you can do is laugh or drink.........

I'm unemployed. Everyone is up to speed on this fact, right? Each day consists of an early wake up call, turning on the computer and sifting through the countless job boards searching for the needle in the haystack which will one day be my next high paying, consulting job. Key words: high-paying, consultancy.

Last week, I stared at the wall and sat at my computer from 9-5. This week, I relocated to the dining table with a lovely view of the communal gardens. It's not as depressing as the magnolia (they don't sell Navajo paint here. go figure!) walls.

Thinking that this respite will be good for the soul, I plug away each day sending out countless CVs (aka resumes) to recruiters and employers. You would think I was doing this peacefully, however, 2 flats are being gutted. From 9-5, drills, hammering, swearing, hauling...it's absolutely doing my head in. I CAN'T THINK! It's making me sketchy, there may be voices surfacing in my head. And just when you think the crews are done for the day, calm sets in....BZZZZZZZZZZZ blasts through the floor penetrating my numbed brain. All I can think is this must be some freaking joke and I have to laugh.

Tomorrow I swear the lawnmowerman and weedwacker/leaf blower boy come; it might get ugly.

Stop the madness!

This is a 30 second re-enactment of the drill....

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see it lulls you to thinking it stops and

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Didn't God make some covenant with Noah that there would never be 40 days/40 nights of rain. WTF? No rainbows, just rain....since May 3 folks. Honestly!

Do you know where getting flooded ? I am happily safe in Muswell HILL, but the other towns...not so much. May 3rd commenced the Noah's Ark reeactment. "See the animals 2x2, see which is which and who is who?" (that's the song from my play at St. Pius V in first grade-The Rainbow Express-I was a butterfly)

The Model town is now under water, there will be no hikes of the Cotswolds anytime soon and I may be helping my friend fill sand bags in Windsor. I have free time!

Mom and Dad closing in on Warwick Castle.

My parents came to London a week prior to graduation. I enjoyed sleeping on the floor, Ian got the boot to the south side of the river and my parents fought over who snored and stole the blankets in my Dream House Barbie size of a bed. (yeah, so don't let this picture fool you.)

Good times were had by all. They were greeted with a week of thunderstorms, but thankfully we were all trained by the rain of Portland to not let the weather ever get you down. They quickly found the nearest bakery in town and I introduced them to my new life in the City.

They arrived the last day of my work at Corex and I greeted them beaming with joy as I made my exit. A new adventure awaits me! I hope???!

My father wanted to return to Warwick Castle as that was the only thing he apparently enjoyed when he visited the UK 45 years ago. He rarely mentions that he was travelling with my great grandmother and her entourage....could that have something to do with it? Just a thought. You all remember the last time that I hung out with my grandparents...the geriatric sing-along.

The original Fab Four.

So why have I been MIA?

Well, I took off to Greece when I got my visa. I had originally planned to meet up with Rach and RJ on their postponed honeymoon. From there, I was to dart to Chicago for my cousin, Cait's wedding. It was great to hang out with the Toner clan as most I have not seen since I've been away at school. Got a quick shopping trip in on Michagan Avenue..you know the necessities like Walgreens. How sad is that? Each time I get home, it is a must do. Toiletries just aren't the same in the UK, let me tell you folks! Bygones, I did a 11 minute walk about Old Navy just in time to scoop a few tanks...$6!! Ya-woo! Kids $6 just doesn't happen over here. Have you seen the exchange rates? Have you seen my bank account??

Anyways, wedding was great. Cousin Cait is happy. Toners are fab!

Oh, and I'm an aunt twice over! Ya-woo! Details to follow.

I don't know where my travel book is so I really can't remember what this was, but I liked it. The olive trees were great, however keep in mind that olives only taste nice once they've been prepared. Olives...straight from the tree???BAD!

The view looking up at the Acropolis. There is a ton of work happening at the Acropolis so a large portion was under rehab, I suppose it's a little old and perhaps in some serious need. Amazing 360 views from the hills and the only thing I could think about was that Sparta movie.

Rachel and I in Athens.

We met up in Plaka, the old village of Athens. As Rachel and RJ had been plaqued with rain their entire European vacation, they brought the clouds to Athens too. I needed a break from the sun and sand so it was a good thing.

Athens was great for sun and food. I wasn't too thrilled with the taxi drivers as many tried to rip you off. Athens definitely didn't have the feel as the other Euro cities I've visited. I really did go just to lay out and relax, but I did capture a few sights and was truly amazed at the Acropolis. I wished I had visited my first day in town so I could get a better appreciation for the city. Cleanliness is not a top priority and the Greeks are first to tell you that it's one of the poorest countries in the EU. I don't think they can claim that now that Bulgaria and Romania were welcomed.

Stop the Presses!!!! I got my visa!

Ya-woo. I found out just in time to book a really expensive trip to Greece and Chicago. Actually, I don't care. I'm just very excited to see friends and family.

Work visa....2 year stay in UK.

Currently, I'm in Athens. Photos coming later.

Headed to Chicago for Caitlin's wedding. Big Toner family bash.

Talk to you soon.
Laura

Here's to you Uncle Tom!

This is a re-enactment of my 1st Communion picture that has haunted me into adulthood.

During the Cotswold experience, we went to Burton-on-the-Water which is home to a quaint village, zoo, motor museum, and.....the Model Village. I didn't know what to expect, but sure enough the model is an exact replica of Burton. Talk about spare time! The only thing I noticed was that maybe some of the residents should be spending some of that time in the gym rather that playing with baby bricks and mortar. That's just a friendly suggestion.

*69, not so much.

This is part of the 10 mile walk in the Cotswolds. It smelled significantly better than the booths in London, can't imagine why.

For tonight we dine in hell!

As we started our trek in the Cotswolds, we were met with cows who dared us to cross their path. I'm not the best with animals. Again, I blame cartoons for my stored knowledge. The childhood brainwashing far outlasted an encyclopedic learning when in school.

I still struggle with the polar bears and penguins...I thought they were friends, bulls bad, mountain lions...thought they were like bobcats. Back to cows, the only vision that came to mind was my brother's, childhood reenactment of the Incredible Hulk which took place when my family was in Iowa. He proceeded to pose and roar like the Hulk frightening the cows and there was a possilibity of the cows busting down the gate. My only other knowledge of cows is the size of its eyeball. Why do I know this? Because when I was in 2nd Grade, my lovely cousin Debbie asked if I wanted a drink of her Strawberry Milkshake from McDonalds. What kid would turn that down? As I started to take the drink, the only thing that cup held was cows eyeball that was stolen from the high school biology lab.

Fascinating thing in England, no one can stop people from walking through your private property. We have the green light to cross this field with the exception of the cows who have taken on the Spartan fighting form. My camera is not zoomed, actually I couldn't get the whole pack (are cows packs? herd) in my shot. My camera is sitting on the fence and I'm clicking.

Four educated adults and a herd of cows commence the staring contest/stand-off until one local opens the fence and starts walking.

"Can we follow?"

"Hurry up, I'm late for the pub. Surely you're not afraid of these cows. They're dumb and afraid of you. They'll move as we walk, but hurry I need a pint."

Cool experience.

I love that Sir Walter Scott!!

So I was walking to work the other day and I saw this Blackberry in the middle of the sidewalk. Sometimes I really hate these moments because of all of the thoughts that bombard your mind.
"If I pick it up and put it in my bag and someone sees me they'll think I'm stealing this." "Great, look what I get to deal with today!"
"Cool, maybe I'll never find the owner and I can step it up from my 30P phone that always resets the VoiceMail setting"
"What fabulous reward will I get for a Blackberry"
"I'll just leave it on the fence and the owner will find it"
"Phone, what phone?...walk over it and don't look back." \
"I hate CATHOLIC guilt!!!"

Does anyone feel me on this?

I pick up the phone, assess my surroundings and see that there's a work truck beside me and roofers working at the house adjacent. I proceed to sound like an idiot saying, "sir, excuse me..Sir?! My timing was a little off between the moments of silence and his hammering away. As the scaffolding was draped with the roofers advertisements, I made a call to the office with the query whether crews were issued with Blackberries. The laugh at the end of the line was my answer. I next left my business card at the home address thinking that I would soon be the victim of prank calls, or possibly the thought that maybe this household would attempt to steal the phone from me. Take it!

By this time, I'm late to work and now have to deal with this. Blackberries have never been my thing...way too many communication capabilities coming at ya and it really leaves users with no outs for saying, "oh, I didn't get your call, email, fax, SMS, RSS." In a nutshell, I don't know how to use it to find the info and get this back to the appropriate person. My coworker gets me to the address book so I can peruse for the standard titles..Mom, Home, ICE, Office...something. After 500+ contacts, no clues whatsoever. Surely I must have missed something, so I'm back at it. Hmmm...BBC, Her Majesty's Treasury, Dun and Bradstreet, Morgan Stanley, Home Office, Security Task Force, Virgin, the Big Four, financial institutions, every government office...you get my drift? All of sudden I'm thinking, "hey this guy's big time." Let's look for Tony Blair!

So this guy's Big Time, so shouldn't he be calling his phone wondering if someone picked it up? I'm back to work and just sitting close in case Big Time calls. After an hour, I start thinking that surely there is something in this phone with the person's details and I find a name and phone number with the "if lost/return" message.

Here are my hints:
1. First Name
The name: "Peter, _____, and Mary" "_____ Frank is you friend" "John, ___, Ringo, George" "Pope John ____, II"
2. Surname (last name folks), 2 syllables
1st syllable
Mr. _ _ _ _ Bar
The _____, the bad, the ugly"
"___ night, and ____ luck"

2nd syllable
And on the sixth day, God created _ _ _.

One last hint for the surname..."John _ _ _ _ _ _ _ starred in Roseanne, the Big Lebowski, and Arachnophobia.

Moving on. I call this fool stating, Sir you dropped your phone at 6 Pages Hill. I live and work in Muswell Hill, here are my digits, let me know when you want to meet.

Due to the amount of prominent contacts and now discovering his name, I of course hit Google and start the search. Mr. Big Time is an MP. I call his office, but no one is there. I find his phone the same day Blair announces his departure. No wonder no one's been calling, there are definitely more important things going on. Around 2 I finally get a call.

MP: my "wife" got the message about the lost phone. Let's meet, but I just don't know how the phone ended up in Muswell Hill. I don't live anywhere close...it was stolen.
LT Thoughts: Really Sir, because you've made many phone calls since 4:30 this morning. One to your wife or sister....what a freaking coincidence. If someone stole it, you sure haven't been trying to call it!
LT: I called your office, you're the MP right, I'm sure you need the phone how should I get this to him, etc.
MP: "No, I'm not an MP" (the contacts state otherwise)
MP: "Oh, I can't meet" (ya, b/c then I'd know you were the MP right?)
LT: Ian works in the City, he could bring it tomorrow.
End of call
MP: "Oh, I can't meet in the City." (ya, b/c then I'd know you were the MP right?) Let me call you back.
End of call
MP: "Oh, my wife will pick it up tomorrow b/c she's coming to Muswell hill"
LT: Really Sir, that's odd, I thought you didn't live close. Where shall we meet.
MP: Let me call you back
End of Call
MP: My wife has a Doctor's Appt tomorrow in Muswell Hill.
LT: Really? (all doctors here serve a radius of 1/2 mile.) Great where shall I drop the phone
MP: Let me call you back
end of Call
MP: The address is 6 Pages Hill, that's pretty close to you right?
LT: Yes, shall I leave it with reception?
MP: Just drop it through the Mailslot, but only between 9 a.m. and before the appt at 4.
Lt: Would you like me to put it in a padded envelope before it falls to the ground and falls to a million pieces?
MP: Yes. Can I have your address so my "wife" can send you a box of chocolates.
LT: That's kind, but no thanks.
End of call

As I'm walking home from work sure enough 6 Pages Hill is exactly freaking across the street from where I found the phone. That one question, "Are you an MP?" set off a series of ridiculous lies. Little did he know that I was facing deportation.

Shady acres, whereas I wanted to send it to the Daily Mail and have them figure out the story, I bought my padded envelope and enclosed a little note, "Oh what a tangled web we weave, when we practice to deceive."

Now, every morning I walk by this home trying to figure out what exactly is going on behind the closed doors. I've seen a few men come out...option 1. The resident doctor is a female...option 2. Politician living out of district....I've never seen that happen between Torrance and PV!....Option 3. Meth lab...Option 4. I don't know, but I definitely enjoy my walk to work thinking of silly possibilities. Also, I get a little tingle of anticipation thinking my lovely MP is walking around with a guilty conscience.

Good people, good times. (1st syllable)

L

32....I'm OLD
Curses!!!

Thank you for the birthday greetings! A few notes:
Unfortunately my father has no idea when I was born and called me on April 30 Cali time for a wake up call on May 1. Folks...I'm only 8 hours ahead. It's not that hard or serious.

My sis, Mo, tried to buy me concert tickets in London and while she was on a UK site her credit card info was highjacked and the bank called her with fraud notices of £900 charges to Costco. The Mastercard has since been suspended. See what happens when you're nice!

Sarah has sent the best b-day card ever with a drawing of her Gerkin-tongue-licking photo...Remember the post in August when Sarah was being a dirty bird? (I'll try and post.)

So the latest and greatest is that my visa has been declined. What does this mean?
1. fork out another £750 pounds ($1500)
2. no passport
3. no passport means no CHICAGO and cousin's wedding
4. No travel to Greece to meet RJ and Rachel
5. pending illegal alien status
6. I could be kicked out in 30 days

Life has taken a peculiar turn.

Again, that birthday card rocks!!! Love it. I'll try to post the other picture so you can do a side-by-side analysis. Kisses. L

I'm having a RANT.....

i am on UK lock down and not loving it!! i need off the island. Somebody, please save me.

If I get erased, the UK government did it. Not that I'm into conspiracy theories or anything. The Home Office has my whole life wrapped up into a little package of 2 envelopes. Everytime I correspond with them it seems to cost £350 POOOONDS. Not cool.

I'm bored and should be working, must make sales. I've been scolded by my cousin Caitlin for adjusting my spelling to the UK english. Well let me just tell you that I'll take the berating from home rather than the comments from British colleagues. I fought the Z-zeds and extra consonants when I was at Edinburgh; however, no that I'm trying to emmerse myself into the working world I must submit to some brainwashing. I am holding out on Route, I refuse to pronounce it ROOT, and quite often I'm selling Learning Routes to Organisssssations. Phrases such as "I'm fine, Sure, I don't care" have all been deemed inappropriate or rather strong statements. I never really tried the "Whatever" phrase in the workplace.

Ok, i'm back at it.

Chicago.....here I come. Anyone wanting to see me stateside will need to be in the Chicago/Indiana area the weekend of June 9 or the 9th June.

Cheers, L

Good thing this blog is not anywhere close to being part of my New Year’s resolution. Bust out the difibulator! Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation! Someone give me a jump start! Please, something to bring this thing back to life. Alright, I’ll do better. Just so you know this blog is reflective of my life right now. I am seriously focused in some areas and completely lacking in others. My inbox now contains more recruitment notices for job postings than short quips from friends and family. Not good. While the jobs may pay the bills, my school bus is surely to find itself running on empty in no time.

I am well. I have been busy over the past 3 months and am absolutely amazed at how quickly time has past. I have dedicated a sufficient portion of my time to getting things in order for the Home Office in order to transition from my student to work visa. It was supposed to take 5-6 weeks and I believe that time has come and gone. I am slightly concerned, but it should really work in my favour.

Here is the overview of what I have been up to.

January-Went to Bristol with Ana and Laura
February-Went to Brighton and John Fellows came to town
March
Celebrated Ian’s birthday in Edinburgh
My friend Brent Herrera came to visit his sis Jen in London. (Brent’s my prom date from high school.)
St. Paddy’s Day in London
April-went to Edinburgh for Easter

Good thing this blog is not anywhere close to being part of my New Year’s resolution. Bust out the difibulator! Mouth-to-mouth resuscitation! Someone give me a jump start! Please, something to bring this thing back to life. Alright, I’ll do better. Just so you know this blog is reflective of my life right now. I am seriously focused in some areas and completely lacking in others. My inbox now contains more recruitment notices for job postings than short quips from friends and family. Not good. While the jobs may pay the bills, my school bus is surely to find itself running on empty in no time.

I am well. I have been busy over the past 3 months and am absolutely amazed at how quickly time has past. I have dedicated a sufficient portion of my time to getting things in order for the Home Office in order to transition from my student to work visa. It was supposed to take 5-6 weeks and I believe that time has come and gone. I am slightly concerned, but it should really work in my favour.

Here is the overview of what I have been up to.

January-Went to Bristol with Ana and Laura
February-Went to Brighton and John Fellows came to town
March
Celebrated Ian’s birthday in Edinburgh
My friend Brent Herrera came to visit his sis Jen in London. (Brent’s my prom date from high school.)
St. Paddy’s Day in London
April-went to Edinburgh for Easter

Deep Thoughts by Laura……………………………………………….
Some of the randomness is life.
My parents are coming to Edinburgh for graduation….Ya-woo! Both will be here for 10 days and then my mom and I will head to Ireland for a trip to the west coast.
I went to the Charlotte Church Show, that was a good time. Avril Lavigne was on with a few others that you wouldn’t know.
My brother is starting a business that I’m vying for an equity stake and advisory role. Right now he just wants a business plan for free.
I received David Bowie CD, who knew that I’m a big fan. I’m one of those people that don’t know artists nor song titles.
Rachel and RJ are headed to Italy and Greece for their honeymoon in May/June. I’m hoping to join them.
I’ll head stateside for my cousins wedding June 9. Shopping in $$$$!! Ya-woo can’t wait.
Abu Dhabi? Would you live there? I’ll keep you posted.
I Joined a book club. Truly it’s my worst nightmare, but I think it’s good for me. It’s part of my self-help programme of learning to interject myself and thoughts into new situations. The goal-speak in a clear and concise manner, and stop sitting back and listening to people; make an impression with a statement.
I got my MBA for 3 reasons:
1. Career progression
2. Learn from a strong organisation/strategy firm that would position me for an international role
3. serious USD or GBP
I’m writing it because instead of just talking about it, now it should become about 90% true.

Brent and Jen are headed to Edinburgh this weekend as well. Should be an interesting time in the City. Four days off of work! I’m still on UK lock down. I have no passport, no driver’s license, no paper identity. If I get erased….call Tony Blair…we’re tight.

Brent is here!

Brent Herrera was my prom date, and yes that’s what he says anytime he introduces me to someone. His comments are usually followed by, we never danced. He took me when I was a sophomore and I thought that I was on top of the world. We have been great friends ever since. He killed me over the weekend. We headed to a few bars and clubs in Soho and I had the best time out. I’ve tried to get hag status over here, however, it just hasn’t worked out too well. Great night dancing, trying to play match-maker and having great conversation. The night left me sans voice and yet another week of ailments. Curses! Thankfully, I’m feeling much better as the weekend approaches and I’m ready to rock and roll again.

The great thing about Brent coming to London was the fact that he was coming to visit his sister, Jen. We went to Rosary together and I haven’t seen much of her since high school. She lives in north London as well. I’m looking forward to the chance of us hanging out. Open school bus door.

Ian’s Birthday in Edinburgh
In March, I headed to Edinburgh for the weekend to celebrate Ian’s birthday. I realised that I had not been back since November. I continually find myself anxious when I return to Edinburgh. The scars of falling behind in reading, not quite grasping the Discounted Cash Flow financial concepts or looming paper still haunt me. I do wonder if that will pass with time or if I am just scarred for life.

Ian’s birthday. I actually pulled off a surprise gathering of his friends and family. My deceptive behaviour started early in the morning with the sudden craving for Mexican food. I avoided his plan to head to East Lothian, a journey outside of town. Good stuff. Met with friends and enjoyed a long weekend away.

St. Paddy’s Day in London
People are often asking if the school bus is full. Well it really ebbs and flows. St. Paddy’s day was a real kick in the ass reminding me of this. It started out there was a group of us, and then there was one. I was not going to give up though, for the love of god, it was St. Paddy’s Day and I was going to salvage the day. Calling up my frenchie friend, Jean Marie, he and a friend met me for a pint and no sooner had we finished the beers, he wanted to go to the movies. Not really understanding the ST. Patrick’s tradition, the need to drink Guinness and sing traditional songs. However, I gave up, went to the movies, and was home by midnight with just a few pints down. No fear, the parade and festivals were on Sunday and I ventured solo and enjoyed the festivities in Trafalgar and Leicester Square and Covent Garden.

I think I have said before that some of my friends are from Westminster Cathedral which I attend on Sunday evenings. My St. Paddy’s weekend concluded with the realisation that my social interaction really just consists of a Groundhog Day scenario. I see people once a week, some are new, and others are old faces that sit next to someone else. I have met these people; however, I continue to have the same freaking conversation repeatedly. I have met one girl that is great so we hang out rather often.

Weekend in Brighton
Ian has been coming to town interviewing and we decided to head down to Brighton for the weekend. Best city so far in England! Yes, I am definitely biased. It sits on the English Channel and no matter where you are in the city; you are never to far from the ocean. It is great. The ocean is definitely something I miss. Now keep in mind, the AVP will not be playing here anytime soon. The beach consists of cobbles (cobblestones) and just is not conducive to spreading out a beach towel and snoozing for a few hours. Many of the towns have identical high streets (main streets) with repetitive shops, street designs, etc. Brighton is different. Quaint shops, great restaurants, classic pubs and rainbow flags flying high. I loved it. I made the fatale mistake of stumbling upon this cake shop. We are talking Pollyanna style, cut slice, hold with two hands….CAKE. Well I should have remembered that when I was 7 years old, there was a similar experience. Now, I digress! Let me set the scene. It’s August 1982…Servite football just ended it summer football camp which concluded with a family picnic. As a child, the picnic was the place to be. Games, hut drills, cheerleaders’ performance and a smorgasbord of potluck treats. I said it was August right? Well I remember seeing this cake. Chocolate, chocolate frosting and if that was not enough, chocolate morsels. It was not necessarily a Pollyanna re-enactment; however to a second grader the cake was massive. Well after a day of play, snacking on all delicious things, the cake was calling me and I indulged. The picnic ended and my parents took me and my siblings to visit Vince and Esther, our family friends. I remember briefly running around and then that sickly feeling quickly came upon me. Thankfully, we were all hanging out in the backyard because without warning, I covered the back driveway with a new version of chocolate cake. I do not know if it is revisionist’s history or if it was a scene stripped from Stand By Me, but I swear my brother followed suit. Who knows! Nevertheless, let’s just say that the taste of chocolate cake has never quite left me. Nearly 25 years later, I taste that “same” chocolate taste and the stomach twirls.

Back to Brighton.

Brighton was great until that fateful trip to the cake store. I think that the title gives it away. Something like the Chocolatey-wocalatey. The cake was amazing; however not even an hour later, definitely struggling, train ride home…not good…missing a week of work….POOR. “Say no to chocolate cakes!”

Brighton is amazing…you should really visit.

John Fellows in London

Here is John at the Mayflower in south London. He is a big fan of the fancy-a-pint website and finds great pubs all over the city. While he ventured here 3 times since the New Year, we’ve met up a couple of times finding great pubs such as the Churchill Arms, Prospect of Whitby, and some stops near Euston Station. I took him to my Sunday hangout, the Columbia Street Market in Spitalfields. My sister introduced me to the market when she was out in August and I have grown to love the flower market and all of its attractions. I pick up my olives, get a bunch of apples, select some cheese from the corner shop that has been there for last 100 years, and wander the art galleries as if I have not seen the art from a few weeks before. The area is only open on Sundays which should tell you how well they do on the one day.

Girls’ weekend in Bristol

Got together with Laura and Ana my girlfriends from the MBA programme. We met up in Bristol for a weekend get away. We stayed in Clifton at a B&B just outside of the city centre which ended up the place to be. City centre shuts down on the weekend and is strictly a business district mon-fri. Since the MBA, Laura and I found that our weekend habits have mellowed maybe not necessarily to the liking of Ana who wanted to hit clubs and go dancing. The Laura team won and I think we were in bed by midnight returning to work on Monday nice and refreshed. The town was enjoyable with great views, art galleries is celebrating the abolition of the slave trade later this year. That is nice of them.

Laura Toner, MBA!!!!!!

Ya Woo, I passed. I found out on Friday that I passed the MBA and will definitely be graduating this June. Save the date, June 28-Edinburgh...be there for the British Isles pub crawl starting in London to Edinburgh to Galway. Yeah, you're jealous!

While I wasn't terribly worried, there's always that little doubt in the back of your mind...maybe I didn't cite a source in my dissertation...maybe that's not what that author stated at ALL. Sometimes you never know, but speculation is over and the grades are in hand.

Actually the grades were immediately sent to the Home Office. As I've been saying and everyone is in denial, I'M APPLYING FOR A UK WORK VISA. I MIGHT STAY FOR 2 MORE YEARS. UK....not USA, London....not Los Angeles. So the application process has been very time consuming. You try explaining to Long Beach State that you need a letter that states your degree was awarded in the English language. I've made many friends and enemies in the departments of the 49ers. Bygones, my attorney will tell me tomorrow if I have everything in order.

My Boss found my blog....NOT COOL!

I'm headed to Brighton this weekend and looking forward to getting away. My passport will soon be sent to the Home Office for an undisclosed amount of time. I have island fever right now, but am scared to leave the country as my student visa expires on none other than April 1st. I'm sure next weekend I'll jump on a plane somewhere just to find some warm sun. Good thing is that London is quickly headed toward the summer solstice and so were gaining an hour every month on the sun. No more lights out at 4 p.m!

Alrights, that's it..I'm out.

Love Loyalty Friendship

Laura

Happy Birthday Grandma!!
Wishing you all of the best this year....plays, tap dancing, karaoke, live entertainment, family festivities and a million grandkids.
Love, Loyalty and Friendship....
Laura "I hope I look this good at 80" Toner
or
Laura "my grandma is hotter than yours" Toner
or
Laura "granddaughter of the Queen of Leisure World" Toner

Hope you have a great day. Love and miss you, L

Me and Hannah Rose...Staying Strong with the #1 Aunt Status

The first birthday is just around the corner. She finally crossed the picket line and stopped her personal transportation strike and is crawling and walking. I was on a mission from god both times home to teach her to crawl and got noWHERE.

Cheers, L

This is where I live...more or less, it's a reflection. My whole flat faces this communal garden. The morning it snowed the only thing i could see were the treetops dusted white.

Greetings to you!

Well it snowed this week and boy was it cold. It was great to wake up to the calm of the snow and it was quite a surprise. I thought it was only going to snow in the north. Depending on who you talk to...it either gets tons of snow and the temp drop to -10 or the flip side states that it just never gets too cold.

I have found the downfalls of having a slightly larger flat, it is rather difficult to heat...one small radiator, a wall unit fire place and a heater in my room. Who knew that the vents in my room actually pumped in heat. It really good to find out the morning after it snows! I'm now a big fan of the Japanese heating toilets. Not that I have one, but it would sure be nice as I walk into the bathroom with it 4 ft drafty window. Now I know why they were actually invented.

Work is starting to move along. I finally got out of the office and was able to network and begin establishing my contacts. I had my first off-friday and spent it with Torrance City Attorney, John Fellows. We managed to good pub crawls, one along Euston station closer to my stomping grounds and then another on the south side of the river, next to the London Bridge (the new one remember!) My next off-friday I am headed to Bristol and Bath. I am meeting up with two of my girlfriends for the weekend. It's the start of the 6 nations rugby...not that I'm too interested, but people will be descending into the area. I should have some pics to post too.

Family update, Ted and Joni are having another little girl. Hannah is starting to walk which my mom forgets every once in awhile. My dad had his debut on You Tube... which I found hilarious. And the Trifecta is still going strong and crazy fun.

Talk soon.
Laura

Happy New Year!!

Alright, so the 12 days of Christmas have come and gone. The fireworks along the Thames dissolved to dust. The long holiday curbed with moving and starting work, a real paying nearly 40 hours/week job.

So, I'm no longer a student. The dissertation is done and dusted and now graduation is pending. I am waiting for the dissertation grade and hoping to at least get a distinction (only on the paper; let's all be very realistic!) My new flat is big, bigger than the beach pad. Kitchen, it's bigger than Long Beach. Slowly but surely, I'm moving back into the wage earning world that affords a normal home, a running shower, heat producing radiators and windows that keep the snow out.

Work is going well and I am in fact putting my new MBA skills to use. Look out! Despite not taking a negotiations class, I did manage to bargain once again the lovely Torrance 9/80 schedule. I figure the 3 day weekends will allow for some travels to the continent a little more often. Those travels I'm very much looking forward too.

I have started the visa application process. The thought of becoming an illegal alien here in the near future is of growing concern. Hopefully the paperwork will come together or I may be in New York during Easter. Laura Toner, Illegal Alien at large....not so much.

Oh, and if enquiring minds wanted to know. The soaps have since ceased their international travels. They have been regifted to none other than my mother in her stocking at Christmas. I did in fact purchase 3 more. Yeah, she wasn't too happy about that story. And I'll refrain from repeating the expletives of the phone exchange. I will have you know that I did not receive one bar of soap this year. See, all it ever takes is just a little open communication between people.

Alright, I'm done. I'll be the proud new owner of a 2 in1 washer/dryer tomorrow morning. A dryer...say goodbye to jeans drying for 3 days! Ya-woo.

Happy New Year! Looking forward to another year of adventure.

much love, Laura